Funky Hot Medina

Hi everyone!

Ok, so it's my intention to send this email to you twice - the first time with an attachment (a voice clip from me!!) and the second time without, in case some people have trouble downloading/opening attachments. If you get the first email ok, then just delete the second one. :)

Where did I leave you last...? Ah yes, back in Egypt.

On our tour they would often give us a "welcome drink" at some of the places/businesses that we visited. It was Tang. Tang is big in Egypt, it seems. Strange thing is, we were advised not to drink the tap water in Egypt, although the locals drink it with no problem. Given that Tang is an orange-flavoured powder, I asked my tour leader if these places were mixing their Tang with the tap water, and he said no - that it was made with bottled water. RIGHT. I don't believe that for a second. And neither should you.

When going to an Egyptian restaurant, this is how it will generally go:
1. You tell them what you want.
2. They bring the food and you tell them what you ordered so they can give it to you.
3. They will not bring you your bill until you ask.
4. You have to tell them what you ordered so that they can figure out how much you owe.
5. What they say you owe is not actually what you should owe according to the menu, and they hope you don't notice this.
6. You pay with cash, and they will deny that they have any change.

Oh, and the cleanliness of food and drink? They don't have standards like at home. I mentioned that they drink the tap water, right? And that they get the tap water from the Nile? And that their sewage goes in the Nile? (I hope your sister doesn't do much travelling Lauren - she'd never eat!)

The light switches here are backwards - you push down to turn them on and upwards to turn them off. When I get home I will probably be doing it backwards. I will also probably ignore people when they talk to me, be afraid to cross the street, and brush my teeth with bottled water. I wonder if my daily pop quota will make its way back to North America, too - all the good dental habits I acquired are going to waste! D'oh.

For our last night in Cairo, we changed hotels and stayed in a really nice one called the Meridien Heliopolis. The guy that drove us there was the only person I had seen in Egypt that used turn signals. It was neato! His name was Ehab. I remember his name because I was thinking about Captain Ahab from Moby Dick. Ya, ok, random. Whatevs.

In the fancy hotels that we have been staying in, there is usually a bidet in the bathroom. How exactly do you use a bidet, anyways? I mean, are you supposed to SIT on it? IN it? I can see all sorts of SNL skits coming out of the experimentation with the bidet. What if you got stuck in the bidet? My butt is a little wider than some of the ones we've seen... hehe.

So, we travelled from Cairo to Milan, and all I have to say about that is: it's nearly impossible to not notice when then guy beside you on the airplane is having an anxiety attack. Yep, lucky me, the guy beside me seemed very afraid of flying. He nearly hyperventilated during takeoff. Thing is, when it's an Arab MAN, you pretty much don't want to be friendly for fear that you are giving the wrong impression. Anyways, the flight was not full and he eventually moved to an empty row so he could spaz-out in private.

Then we were back in Italy. Ahhhh, being able to trust the food/water again is such a luxury! We only had a few hours there - stayed at another very lovely hotel and then were up at the godawful hour of 2:30am to get on our airport shuttle bus. This time we were flying out of Bergamo airport. Note to self: Italian airports don't make finding bathrooms very easy.

Back on the airplane again. This time flying Ryanair from Milan to Fes in Morocco. Ryanair is the cheapest airline ever, and they nickel and dime you for every service you could possibly want. Which means, it's not very good service. Case in point: they let a woman on the airplane that shouldn't have been there. SHE thought she was supposed to be there, but they did not. Why they didn't discover this before she actually made it on the plane, I don't know. So we sat on the tarmac for an hour and Tracy & I had a front row seat and watched the woman scream at various airport employees. The police finally came, she was taken away, and the whole airplane erupted in applause. And so we were off to Morocco.

When we arrived in Fes we had to go through customs of course and we got pulled aside for a health check and I got interrogated a bit. I got interrogated in French. Did I mention that I don't speak French? I actually knew what the guy was saying, but couldn't answer him appropriately ("zut alors!" , "mon dieu!" and "j'adore le francais, ca va?" came to mind) or quickly enough. Thank goodness for Tracy!! She saved me. I had visions of being hauled off to a Moroccan jail before she came to my rescue.

We were picked up at the Fes airport and taken to our Dar - a Dar is like a guest house. We stayed in Dar El Hana, which was right in the center of the medina. The medina is a section of the city, usually enclosed by walls, that has a billion streets that run in every direction and is home to a bazillion people and shops. There are 9000 streets in the Fes medina - okay, so that's not a billion, but it might as well be. It's still insane. You can get lost for hours in there - another reason why we needed to get picked up.

As soon as I got in the medina, I noticed very strong smells. I thought it was going to be like the Egyptian markets, but it was different in a number of ways. For example, we rarely got talked to. Where it's a constant harassment in Egypt everywhere you go, for the most part in Morocco they leave you alone. The odd person tries to talk to you or sell you something, but coming from Egypt we were well-rehearsed in ignoring people. There are donkeys and carts and motorbikes all vying for space in the narrow roads, whereas it was mainly pedestrian traffic in Egypt.

There are cats everywhere, like Egypt. They seem to get fed more in Fes - the shopkeepers will give them raw meat scraps and such. It still strikes me as rather sad.

We had dinner at our Dar, two nights in a row. Oh wow, is Moroccan food ever GOOD. The cook made Tajine, which is slow-cooked meat and spices and fruit in a clay pot. Last night we had chicken and apricots - yummm. The breakfasts are good too -- fruit and yogurt and honey and Moroccan pancakes with butter and jams.

While staying at the Dar, we had dinner with another family. They live in France, but the husband was English. Tracy talked about her family connections to England, and the husband proceeded to say that everyone from that her particular town were redneck hicks and strange ducks. She wasn't impressed. Then he asked me about Canada's political position in Iraq - to which I almost laughed. Can you imagine someone asking me about Canadian politics? Ha ha ha. Well anyways, despite those things, the family was pretty nice.

Yesterday we did a little shopping in the Fes medina and I picked up a couple of things but I am not much of a shopper when I travel. I'm not much of a shopper at home - when I have to carry it around on my back it's even less attractive. Still, I bargained myself a little Moroccan bag even though I hate bargaining! Why can't people just say what the actual price is?? Sheesh. :)

Today we left Fes and carried our heavy bags all through the medina, and I have never sweat so much in my life. I was the Elaan-filling in a donkey sandwich a couple of times, when I was caught in an inopportune moment in the medina. The donkeys give way to nobody. I almost got knocked over, too. It is rather treacherous at the best of times, and when you add another huge pack on your back, medium pack on your front... it gets even worse. But hey, what doesn't kill ya makes you stronger! And sometimes smellier!

We caught a lovely air-conditioned train to Rabat, and there my friend Dan was waiting to pick us up with his 2 lovely daughters. He gave us a quick tour of the school where he works, then took us for a "North American" meal at T.G.I. Friday's. Then we saw an amazing sunset at the beach, went his place where Tracy & I high-fived over the washing machine (yay!!) and settled in. Can't wait to just do whatever, without a schedule and stress.

Home soon, hope y'all are well!
Elaan

p.s. thanks for making it to the end of the longest-email-EVER!